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  1. #1
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    Childhood bullying

    I wonder if anyone has been bullied as a child and wish to share how it affected their growth, and if they still suffer from those memories. Also, how to recover from it.

    I was mostly bullied as a child, by my classmates (which is understandable, as kids can be very cruel), but also by grown ups. As a result I turned out to be a shy guy and still find it difficult to assert myself and find myself having an apologetic tone even when I am right.

    This is a serious thread, so kindly refrain from making jokes about the topic.


    Narendra Modi and Imran Khan Zindabad! NOT

  2. #2
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    I had one classmate who just refused to speak any kind of cuss words in class. Also, he never ever looked at any girl and would always shy away from the area whenever we intentionally talked about girls or other topics [] to him. Me and a few friends bullied him so much during school for the same. Now this thread makes me feel so much guilty of my own actions.

  3. #3
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    I can remember a few times I was bullied, but those memories do not make me sad or angry.

    In fact they do not even cross my mind unless the topic of bullying comes up, these memories do not effect me at all.

    I also remember a few times when I was the one bullying.

    I also do not think about that unless the topic of bullying comes up, but this is the one that bothers me when I do think about it.

  4. #4
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    I used to be bullied till class 4 because I was all alone and FAT so was an easy target for them. Due to all this, I was mentally disturbed and decided I had to change myself to stop all this. I physically build myself strong, worked with a guy who was a boxer. I lost almost 15 KGs of weight after summers break. I used to always answer them back with a punch or two but was so helpless against a group. Those fight backs greatly helped me gain confidence ,and seniors started to take notice of me. Those seniors took a stand against that group. After that I was never bullied.

  5. #5
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    Everyone has been bullied somewhere in his life & at the same time everyone themselves have also bullied someone knowingly or unknowingly. Fortunately i haven't been through a major incident that's left any mental scar but even the slightest of bullying incidents feel bad. I don't think anyone forgets them, be it little or big ones, even if its some lame fat kid stealing your toys as a toddler lol.

    My message to all is that you have to take stand somewhere down the line otherwise the demon will only grow on you. Their fearlessness is your tolerance. The day you fight back, even if the other bully throws more punches at you, researches will tell you there is very little chance of them picking up another fight with you in future because they would know you don't take it. Never be afraid, if you're right you'll be fine and support will get to you soon enough as well.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by shah_1 View Post
    I used to be bullied till class 4 because I was all alone and FAT so was an easy target for them. Due to all this, I was mentally disturbed and decided I had to change myself to stop all this. I physically build myself strong, worked with a guy who was a boxer. I lost almost 15 KGs of weight after summers break. I used to always answer them back with a punch or two but was so helpless against a group. Those fight backs greatly helped me gain confidence ,and seniors started to take notice of me. Those seniors took a stand against that group. After that I was never bullied.
    That is good to hear. My reaction to bullying was complete opposite. I tried to please them. If I brought something good for lunch (which was a rare thing), I would first offer it to my bully. Did their homeworks, made their projects. Acted like a fool, so that they can laugh.

    The worse memories were from grown ups, my cousins and neighbours, who put a disgusting nickname for me, and made life hell whenever I stepped out of home. They would call me by that nickname and I had no option but try to ignore it. I felt like a deer hounded by a pack of wolves. During marriage parties, I would be the common target for grown ups, who would love to discuss how this guy knows anything and is only immersed in books, kitaabi keeda, kuain ka mendhak, sissy, na mard etc etc. So I stopped going to social gatherings too. Have been working on my personal handicaps since I became independent, but still regret what could have been had I had a normal childhood.


    Narendra Modi and Imran Khan Zindabad! NOT

  7. #7
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    I used to get bullied when I was in Pakistan but not in Dubai.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by CricketCartoons View Post
    That is good to hear. My reaction to bullying was complete opposite. I tried to please them. If I brought something good for lunch (which was a rare thing), I would first offer it to my bully. Did their homeworks, made their projects. Acted like a fool, so that they can laugh.

    The worse memories were from grown ups, my cousins and neighbours, who put a disgusting nickname for me, and made life hell whenever I stepped out of home. They would call me by that nickname and I had no option but try to ignore it. I felt like a deer hounded by a pack of wolves. During marriage parties, I would be the common target for grown ups, who would love to discuss how this guy knows anything and is only immersed in books, kitaabi keeda, kuain ka mendhak, sissy, na mard etc etc. So I stopped going to social gatherings too. Have been working on my personal handicaps since I became independent, but still regret what could have been had I had a normal childhood.
    Sorry to hear this, being bullied is the worst feeling ever. I think your approach was wrong, the more you show that you're weaker the more they'll bully you. One guy in that group tried to burn my new shirt with a lighter I was wearing . I smashed a flower pot on his head without any fear of backlash , the group attacked me and I had a broken nose, and my ribs were broken. The seniors rescued me later though. After that incident I was never bullied.

  9. #9
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    I am sorry to hear about this CC.

    Hope things eventually get alright for you.

    A start would be simply letting things go which I am afraid you haven't done till now. Letting go doesn't mean you exactly forgive them or forget them but it just means....you are moving on from it. Its all starts with your mind and slowly things get to a stage where its just a non pleasant memory that doesn't bother you regularly.

    Sometimes in life, its US who is the issue (bcos we constantly let others walk all over us - there is a whole psychology behind this - even nice guys can bully us if we let them walk all over us).

    Sometimes in life, its OTHERS who are the issue (who will do it no matter what we do - in this case, the only way out is to change your group).

    As someone said (Sigmund Freud I think - not sure)..."Before you declare yourself to have depression, make sure you are not surround by a holes".

    Best statement ever.


    I am not one of you. I never was. I am not one of them either.

  10. #10
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    Shah1 - I am sorry for your situation too.

    It sounds very brutal.

    Not sure if your approach is the right one or a practical one (but hey it worked for you). Pleasing them isn't the right one too.


    I am not one of you. I never was. I am not one of them either.

  11. #11
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    I was never really bullied by other children but I was by my form teacher in primary school. He had a habit of making smarmy remarks and picking me out for stupid roles in the school play. I was the executioner in Alice in Wonderland with one line. "Off with his head!" or something. I used to dread going in to school back then, but it was only him, never had any other teacher who made me feel so bad.

  12. #12
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    Edit: Response to CC post which has been deleted by mods.

    Looks like CC has some unresolved issues even with me.

    I am assuming this has got something to do with a recent event (didn't think of it that way when I posted but now it looks like that). Dude will dish out stuff for a month but can't take back anything for even 1 day (not that I even gave anything back in the real sense).

    Suit yourself.

    My post was genuine anyways.
    Last edited by sensible-indian-fan; 31st December 2015 at 12:10.


    I am not one of you. I never was. I am not one of them either.

  13. #13
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    Sensy & Genty

    You two need to sort out your differences and take a selfie. Your differences hurt India's clear superiority over other minor nations on the forum.

  14. #14
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    There was this one kid in grade 5 who used to bully everyone and was a general pain in the ***. One time everybody got so fed up with him that they all ganged up and beat him up. He never bullied anyone after that.


    #Hum apko container deingaye dharnay ke liyay

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Syed1 View Post
    There was this one kid in grade 5 who used to bully everyone and was a general pain in the ***. One time everybody got so fed up with him that they all ganged up and beat him up. He never bullied anyone after that.
    That happened at my school as well. There was a huge lad built like a walrus who had a nickname of Tank. He must have weighed twice as much as any other kid in the year group. It was decided that we would all pile in and beat the crap out of him to stop him from dominating everyone with his sheer size. When the time came I launched in and landed on his back. No one else joined in and he turned round to see what was going on. I let go and pretended I had just bumped into him and narrowly avoided getting squashed like a gnat.

  16. #16
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    I had this one Urdu teacher in class 4 and 5 who used to bully me for no reason whatsoever. Hadnt thought about it for a good 7-8 years or so till this thread reminded me of that. It never made sense and still I cant figure out. Why would a grown woman (I assume must be 30+) pick on a kid who is barely 8 or 9 years old. Literally made no sense why she would make proper attempts to humiliate me in front of the whole class. The wierd thing was I was every other teacher's favorite and would almost always come first despite her attempts to sabotage that by messing up my Urdu grades
    Last edited by Slog; 31st December 2015 at 21:20.


    #MPGA

  17. #17
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    There was these two kids that kicked me in the stomach in Pakistan.

    Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slog View Post
    I had this one Urdu teacher in class 4 and 5 who used to bully me for no reason whatsoever. Hadnt thought about it for a good 7-8 years or so till this thread reminded me of that. It never made sense and still I cant figure out. Why would a grown woman (I assume must be 30+) pick on a kid who is barely 8 or 9 years old. Literally made no sense why she would make proper attempts to humiliate me in front of the whole class. The wierd thing was I was every other teacher's favorite and would almost always come first despite her attempts to sabotage that by messing up my Urdu grades
    Your story sounds similar to mine except come to think of it I had problems with two other teachers in secondary school as well. I only realised a lot later in life that it was them who had the problem not me. Getting pulled out of class to be hissed at by a teacher for looking at him insolently was pretty weird.

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mahmood101 View Post
    There was these two kids that kicked me in the stomach in Pakistan.

    Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk
    Was it a one time thing, or did it occur quite often?


    #Hum apko container deingaye dharnay ke liyay

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Syed1 View Post
    Was it a one time thing, or did it occur quite often?
    It was a onetime thing, but they often thought I was stupid because I couldn't speak urdu fluently so they mocked me for it



    Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by sensible-indian-fan View Post
    Edit: Response to CC post which has been deleted by mods.
    Damn. Missed this one. Any chance of someone putting out an edited version of this.
    Last edited by pillionrider; 1st January 2016 at 04:39.

  22. #22
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    Stand up to them, prove 'em wrong, don't blindly do as they say.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by pillionrider View Post
    Damn. Missed this one. Any chance of someone putting out an edited version of this.

    SIF, you did come across a bit patronising there, must say.
    Maybe it felt that way. Fair enough.

    But I truly meant it genuinely. I have seen CC post for years (the rampaging version and the meek version). If you see his posts in the other New Year thread, you will see where I am coming from.

    If it felt patronizing to him (which was never my intention), then I apologize to him.

    Anyways, his post wasn't anything that spicy. Just "blah blah blah...don't need sympathy...least from you...so just stuff it".
    Last edited by sensible-indian-fan; 1st January 2016 at 04:49.


    I am not one of you. I never was. I am not one of them either.

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by sensible-indian-fan View Post
    Maybe it felt that way. Fair enough.

    But I truly meant it genuinely. I have seen CC post for years (the rampaging version and the meek version). If you see his posts in the other New Year thread, you will see where I am coming from.

    If it felt patronizing to him (which was never my intention), then I apologize to him.

    Anyways, his post wasn't anything that spicy. Just "blah blah blah...don't need sympathy...least from you...so just stuff it".
    He is just kidding you..As someone said, he doesn't believe in half of what he posts But he is very much entertaining and a top poster nonetheless.

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by CricketCartoons View Post
    I wonder if anyone has been bullied as a child and wish to share how it affected their growth, and if they still suffer from those memories. Also, how to recover from it.
    Oh gawd, yeah. I never answered or hit back. I didn't know how. It took me decades to get over it. I grew up with no self-belief at all, and felt worthless and that nothing that happened to me really mattered. I got fired from every job and zero attention from the ladies.

    Eventually I started exercising and put on a couple of stones of muscle, and grew a beard, and spent more money on clothes and the girls started noticing me. I did a week-long course in something called NLP and then everything changed. I stopped getting fired and started getting promoted instead. Suddenly women started seeing me as husband material. I got better at passing exams. I had more motivation in all areas of my life.

    It takes a bit of effort to maintain this - doing a bit of self-hypnosis each day to tell myself I am doing well and am loved and deserve more of everything.

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Robert View Post
    Oh gawd, yeah. I never answered or hit back. I didn't know how. It took me decades to get over it. I grew up with no self-belief at all, and felt worthless and that nothing that happened to me really mattered. I got fired from every job and zero attention from the ladies.

    Eventually I started exercising and put on a couple of stones of muscle, and grew a beard, and spent more money on clothes and the girls started noticing me. I did a week-long course in something called NLP and then everything changed. I stopped getting fired and started getting promoted instead. Suddenly women started seeing me as husband material. I got better at passing exams. I had more motivation in all areas of my life.

    It takes a bit of effort to maintain this - doing a bit of self-hypnosis each day to tell myself I am doing well and am loved and deserve more of everything.
    I have not really been bullied much. I got into some fights with bullies in school and they generally used to stay away from me knowing that i wont take it from them. But i still have confidence issues for unknown reasons.

  27. #27
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    These two guys used to tease me for a bit when i was like 12 or 13. Nothing really that bad just annoying comments which they stopped when i got annoyed and belted one of them. Around that same time i got really tall and solid so i was left alone after that.

    I would always stop bullying if i see it. I can't stand it and that includes adult bullying.


    I have returned.

  28. #28
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    @R3verse Swing. What is your opinion about bullying?

  29. #29
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    Friend request
    This just got awkward ;)


    Tazimi Sirdar

  30. #30
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    lol this thread took a hilarious turn


    In cricket, my superhero is Sachin Tendulkar. He has always been my hero.
    -Virat Kohli

  31. #31
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    @CricketCartoons After all these years I've not had a friend request from you, yet you send one to someone who's only been on here a month?!


    Lions don't lose sleep over the opinions of Sheep

  32. #32
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    Did get bullied for a while in middle school. Then I was a bully myself in 11th but eventually, I realized what I was doing and backed out.


    Be brave and be fearless, and for God's sake, stand up for yourself.

  33. #33
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    At long long, some intrigue!

    We need to get to the bottom of this altercation. Who said what to whom, and when, and why.

  34. #34
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    CC following the saying "Keep you friends close and your enemies closer".


    “I am not young enough to know everything.”

    ― Oscar Wilde

  35. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nostalgic View Post
    At long long, some intrigue!

    We need to get to the bottom of this altercation. Who said what to whom, and when, and why.
    *At long last.

    Ive made the correction just in the nick of time, before @DeadBall has had the opportunity to spot it.

  36. #36
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    Guys please be mindful and respectful of each other.

    To those engaging in hostile arguements: don't make it personal.

    To the "innocent bystanders" witnessing these arguements: Don't encourage such behaviour and please avoid feeding into the negativity.

  37. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by CricketCartoons View Post
    I wonder if anyone has been bullied as a child and wish to share how it affected their growth, and if they still suffer from those memories. Also, how to recover from it.

    I was mostly bullied as a child, by my classmates (which is understandable, as kids can be very cruel), but also by grown ups. As a result I turned out to be a shy guy and still find it difficult to assert myself and find myself having an apologetic tone even when I am right.

    This is a serious thread, so kindly refrain from making jokes about the topic.
    I know what you mean. I hated school from age 11-18.

  38. #38
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    Never really experienced bullying except for a couple of odd incidents.But one incident I wont forget was when I was repeatedly physically beaten up by a teacher in pre-nursery(!),when I was less than 3 years old.One day I complained at home and then I was taken out of the school.The teacher was also fired when my parents threatened to launch a case against the teacher and the school.I dont actually remember the incident but Im often reminded of it by family members.
    Last edited by Arham_PakFan; 14th February 2018 at 07:23.

  39. #39
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    @CricketCartoons and @Firebreaker are 2 posters whose posts I enjoy despite them being weird sometimes..not meaning this post by the way..

  40. #40
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    If a kid has an elder brother than there are less chances that he will get bullied.

  41. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Greenstorm View Post
    If a kid has an elder brother than there are less chances that he will get bullied.
    What if the elder brothers/cousins gang up and bully you because you only like to study and mind your own business. prevent you from growing and developing, and you realize the damage only when you step into the outside word and get scared when you are asked to lead...because all you were trained for was to be obedient and follow orders.

  42. #42
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    Used to get bullied by a guy and his couple of friends in high school. Later, the bullies grew in number and I started becoming a sort of punching bag for 7-8 guys. One of my childhood friend, who was a known goon in the school got to know about it somehow. He sent 5-6 of his friends to the ring leader. They abused him, kicked him, cornered him and made him abuse his family and stuff. While it was disgusting to see, I allowed it to happen.

  43. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by CricketCartoons View Post
    What if the elder brothers/cousins gang up and bully you because you only like to study and mind your own business. prevent you from growing and developing, and you realize the damage only when you step into the outside word and get scared when you are asked to lead...because all you were trained for was to be obedient and follow orders.
    Then you grow older, become more socially successful than them and seek contentment in that.

    If that doesn't work, you can always join a cricket forum and try to bully others

  44. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by pillionrider View Post
    Then you grow older, become more socially successful than them and seek contentment in that.

    If that doesn't work, you can always join a cricket forum and try to bully others
    I will not deny that my past has turned me into a bitter person. But I never bully anyone here. I am always on the side of the soft and the weak and take on the bullies.

  45. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by CricketCartoons View Post
    I will not deny that my past has turned me into a bitter person. But I never bully anyone here. I am always on the side of the soft and the weak and take on the bullies.
    Alright, if that's what you feel you do.

    Anyway on topic. I've been bullied once. I was part of some stupid club in school and on one occasion, the teacher in charge wasn't around. While I was chatting with someone, I got hit by a chalk piece. Turned around to see this senior guy who lived near my place, grinning. The stinging pain and the smug look on his face drove me nuts and I smacked him on the head with a duster. Came home and proudly told my mom. Guess what she did - forced me to go and apologize to him cuz he'd started crying and all. Then began the bullying. He sensed a weakness in my apology and began bullying me on our way back from school. This went on for at least a month until one day I turned to him and punched him in the eye. Didn't report this to my mother and the bullying ended with that.

    So, in your case, you could always go back to your hometown and be nasty to these people and maybe that might help. Revenge pretty much is the only solution to getting over bullying.
    Last edited by pillionrider; 14th February 2018 at 09:19.

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    Quote Originally Posted by pillionrider View Post
    Alright, if that's what you feel you do.

    Anyway on topic. I've been bullied once. I was part of some stupid club in school and on one occasion, the teacher in charge wasn't around. While I was chatting with someone, I got hit by a chalk piece. Turned around to see this senior guy who lived near my place, grinning. The stinging pain and the smug look on his face drove me nuts and I smacked him on the head with a duster. Came home and proudly told my mom. Guess what she did - forced me to go and apologize to him cuz he'd started crying and all. Then began the bullying. He sensed a weakness in my apology and began bullying me on our way back from school. This went on for at least a month until one day I turned to him and punched him in the eye. Didn't report this to my mother and the bullying ended with that.

    So, in your case, you could always go back to your hometown and be nasty to these people and maybe that might help. Revenge pretty much is the only solution to getting over bullying.
    How did he bully you? From your story, you sound like the aggressor.

  47. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by BreadPakoda View Post
    How did he bully you? From your story, you sound like the aggressor.
    Well it was not physical. Verbal silly jokes at my expense that others around (his yearmates or my peers trying to impress and be on the side of the older guy) would laugh at. But as the days wore on, the jokes started extending to my father etc. He probably would have got physical at some point if it had gone on.

    My only advice to CC is that he probably has to get even with them in some way. I don't believe in any of this healing yourself **.

  48. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by pillionrider View Post
    Alright, if that's what you feel you do.

    Anyway on topic. I've been bullied once. I was part of some stupid club in school and on one occasion, the teacher in charge wasn't around. While I was chatting with someone, I got hit by a chalk piece. Turned around to see this senior guy who lived near my place, grinning. The stinging pain and the smug look on his face drove me nuts and I smacked him on the head with a duster. Came home and proudly told my mom. Guess what she did - forced me to go and apologize to him cuz he'd started crying and all. Then began the bullying. He sensed a weakness in my apology and began bullying me on our way back from school. This went on for at least a month until one day I turned to him and punched him in the eye. Didn't report this to my mother and the bullying ended with that.

    So, in your case, you could always go back to your hometown and be nasty to these people and maybe that might help. Revenge pretty much is the only solution to getting over bullying.
    I think this is the relatively innocent form of bullying from the big guy in class, the more sinister one is the one done by adults to kids, without any violence. The bullying is in the form of making fun of you, planting seeds of doubt in your mind to make you feel incapable and worthless. It gets ignored by the parents as there is no physical violence. The scars are on your soul. It stunts your growth. You are always under fear of being mocked and laughed at in public. You can't take risks and make mistakes because you fear people will laugh at you again. As a coping mechanism you turn shy and reticent, avoid people contact and always accept the other guy as the alpha, even if in a group of two. The only time you probably come into your own is when you are online, where people are just text on your screen, no eye contact, no risk of being found out who you are hence any insult remains minimized.

  49. #49
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    Pro tip -

    In an Ideal scenario, no body should fight but we dont live in an ideal world. In your academic career, you need to get into a fist fight at least once to prevent others from bullying you. Doesnt matter if you get beat up. You just have to do it. The earlier you do it, the better. However, make it a conscious point that you dont become the bully after that.

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    I am ashamed to admit that I was a big bulley in my middle and high school days and regularly picked on nerds and timid guys.
    A couple of years ago I ran into this classmate of mine I regularly used to bully. I apologized for my behavior and to my surprise he forgave me . Feels good


    Tazimi Sirdar

  51. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by TM Riddle View Post
    I am ashamed to admit that I was a big bulley in my middle and high school days and regularly picked on nerds and timid guys.
    A couple of years ago I ran into this classmate of mine I regularly used to bully. I apologized for my behavior and to my surprise he forgave me . Feels good
    If you don't mind me asking, what promoted you to bully others?

  52. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nostalgic View Post
    *At long last.

    I’ve made the correction just in the nick of time, before @DeadBall has had the opportunity to spot it.
    An opportunity missed. Damn this habit of mine of sleeping every night.

  53. #53
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    Picking on weak, short, smaller individuals is an animal instinct. You can see this in animal kingdom too. Even the animal babies do that. They always pick on the smaller, shorter individuals of their species and bully them to no end. All of this is part of establishing dominance in the group which later in their lives will have breeding rights with females.

    Also, this is how nature works. Stronger and bigger individuals are given the best chance to breed and the weak do not have a chance to pass on their genes.

    Thankfully in Humans, the stronger individual having the best chance to breed does not work. There is something called brains too. The strongest and smartest ones get the chance. Also we have a nice organized society, law and order. But the basic primal instinct of bullying can still be seen in kids. Nobody teaches them. It is part of the nature.

    My son (who is pretty tall for a 7 year old is soft in nature). We have another kid in our neighborhood who is a few months older than him and he is 4 inches taller than my son. He bullies my kid. I have seen him do that several times and warned him. He says sorry. But the next day, he is back to his original ways.

    I realized that the best way to deal with this is to teach your kid to be rough with anyone who tries to mess with him. So I told him to push the other Indian kid back if he pushes him again. But my Son does not realize that he is strong and tall. In his mind he is small and weak. Its his nature to be gentle and mild. For now, I watch my kid closely until he is slightly older and can defend himself better.

  54. #54
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    There is bullying, and then there is BULLYING.

    Kids in school mocking other kids doesnt hold a candle to bullying. Its the norm. Taking the berties out of someone else is just standard part and parcel of growing up. We have all been there; making fun out of hairstyles, clothes, religion, taste in music etc. If people feel this is akin to bullying then said people have insecurity issues, meaning the problem lies at home, ala, how people are brought up. If this results in someone becoming bitter, then the problem is not at school, but is more psychological. Frankly speaking such mocking made me a stronger person, learning how to stand up for yourself, not developing into a bitter person.

    Then there is BULLYING. Physical abuse mainly, stealing your pocket money, stealing items, physically starting rucks with you in the playground, etc, based on nothing but ignorance and hatred. Trying to impose superiority via physical means. Bullies in this sense often turn out to be weak and insecure themselves hence why they feel the need to impose their superiority.

    So IMO, unless you were battered and creamed physically, you were not bullied. Everything else is just called - *growing up*.

  55. #55
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    Hit the 6 foot mark at the ripe old age of 14 (sadly, stopped growing at 17). Not many 14-15 year olds wanted to bully someone the size of an adult.


    Fauj ka jo yaar hay, mulk ka ghaddar hay,
    Ye jo dehshatgardi hay, is kay peechay wardi hay.

  56. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by DW44 View Post
    Hit the 6 foot mark at the ripe old age of 14 (sadly, stopped growing at 17). Not many 14-15 year olds wanted to bully someone the size of an adult.
    If you are tall and well built, nobody messes with you.

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    I was into outdoor sports since the age of 8 and used to play aikk pukran do, qaidi qaidi, football, cricket, hockey. Sports helps in many ways as it builds confidence, you make friends along with physical advantages and I guess this is the reason why I was never bullied during childhood.

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    Quote Originally Posted by troodon View Post
    If you are tall and well built, nobody messes with you.
    Generally it is the other way round... those that achieve their full height early are the ones that do the bullying.


    I didn't achieve my height until 18-19 but I was always well built and athletic (not because of any hardwork just good genetics thankfully) so I never was the prey of these bullies.

    I often wonder what I'll do if my kid is going through bullying at school. Imma whoop a kid's behind if he lays a hand on my child.


    #Hum apko container deingaye dharnay ke liyay

  59. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by Syed1 View Post
    Generally it is the other way round... those that achieve their full height early are the ones that do the bullying.


    I didn't achieve my height until 18-19 but I was always well built and athletic (not because of any hardwork just good genetics thankfully) so I never was the prey of these bullies.

    I often wonder what I'll do if my kid is going through bullying at school. Imma whoop a kid's behind if he lays a hand on my child.
    Some kids even if they are tall and well built are sissys at heart. My Son is 7 and is 4 foot 3 inches. Very tall for his age. But he is as gentle and mild as a baby rabbit. If he was short, I am sure he would have been a big target. Even now, some kids seems to have realized his gentle nature and try to bully him. I cant be there for him all the times. but when I am there, I watch out for bullies like a Hawk.

  60. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by troodon View Post
    Some kids even if they are tall and well built are sissys at heart. My Son is 7 and is 4 foot 3 inches. Very tall for his age. But he is as gentle and mild as a baby rabbit. If he was short, I am sure he would have been a big target. Even now, some kids seems to have realized his gentle nature and try to bully him. I cant be there for him all the times. but when I am there, I watch out for bullies like a Hawk.
    Dang kids start early now a days.... 7 years old and already bullying. I often wonder is it upbringing, privilege or environment at home that drive kids to be bullies.


    #Hum apko container deingaye dharnay ke liyay

  61. #61
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    Quote Originally Posted by Syed1 View Post
    Dang kids start early now a days.... 7 years old and already bullying. I often wonder is it upbringing, privilege or environment at home that drive kids to be bullies.
    I have seen Kids in the Age Group of 6 bullying.

    It all starts from when they are babies. Some are naturally aggressive and try to take everything away from other babies. My 2nd son goes to a daycare and I see it everyday. Thankfully my 2nd son does not stay quiet when the other babies come and take stuff from him. He cries and screams loud until he gets his toy back. My second son is only 18 months

    I think its all part of nature. Some toddlers don't even cry or scream if other toddlers come and take away their toys. They just accept it and find another toy. I saw this yesterday at temple. A 2year old girl was sharing some almonds with another 2 year old boy. But he took away all the Almonds and refused to give her anything. The girls dad told me - Aaj Kal Sharaftat ka Zamana nahi raha. He did not say anything to the boy. My wife talked to the kid and got the almonds back.

    It all starts very early. Parents don't recognize it. Thats all.

  62. #62
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    One doesnt experience true bullying until adulthood. No harrowing childhood bullying experience can match the all-encompassing, holistic trauma of having a bully for a boss. Or a spouse.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Syed1 View Post
    Generally it is the other way round... those that achieve their full height early are the ones that do the bullying.


    I didn't achieve my height until 18-19 but I was always well built and athletic (not because of any hardwork just good genetics thankfully) so I never was the prey of these bullies.

    I often wonder what I'll do if my kid is going through bullying at school. Imma whoop a kid's behind if he lays a hand on my child.


    Bhai this will make your kid a mommy daddy bacha. If anything happens to him he will come to you straight-away and will not learn to deal with things himself.

  64. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by Syed1 View Post
    Generally it is the other way round... those that achieve their full height early are the ones that do the bullying.


    I didn't achieve my height until 18-19 but I was always well built and athletic (not because of any hardwork just good genetics thankfully) so I never was the prey of these bullies.

    I often wonder what I'll do if my kid is going through bullying at school. Imma whoop a kid's behind if he lays a hand on my child.
    Instead, why not train your kid so he can handle the bullies himself? I'll be the proudest person ever if I'm called in to the principal's office to be told that my kid is getting suspended for getting in to a fight.

    Zero tolerance policies, you know.


    Be brave and be fearless, and for God's sake, stand up for yourself.

  65. #65
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    Quote Originally Posted by Abdul View Post
    Instead, why not train your kid so he can handle the bullies himself? I'll be the proudest person ever if I'm called in to the principal's office to be told that my kid is getting suspended for getting in to a fight.

    Zero tolerance policies, you know.
    Don't try that kn canada or America, white parents will press charges and your sons off to prison. White people will almost never initiate a fight.


    "Be the best version of yourself"

  66. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by Syed1 View Post
    I often wonder what I'll do if my kid is going through bullying at school. Imma whoop a kid's behind if he lays a hand on my child.
    That will most likely make situation worse imo.

    Initially the kid maybe scared but eventually the kid will be seen as a daddy's boy who cant do anything for himself


    #MPGA

  67. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by troodon View Post
    Some kids even if they are tall and well built are sissys at heart. My Son is 7 and is 4 foot 3 inches. Very tall for his age. But he is as gentle and mild as a baby rabbit. If he was short, I am sure he would have been a big target. Even now, some kids seems to have realized his gentle nature and try to bully him. I cant be there for him all the times. but when I am there, I watch out for bullies like a Hawk.
    ive generally seen being involved in sports are a good way for people to come out of their shell. And most importantly find a good support group for situations. Even if your teammates arent the best friends they most likely stick together and help in a phadda.

    Hope you do get your son involved in sports at this age. At that age they dont even have to be good lets be honest. In my experience Indian Americans do very well as a community but they put way too much pressure on their kids from a young age. Esp hate the ones for whom spelling bee is actually a big priority. The kid is likely smart and he will catch up when he is 13-14 but to make him a book nerd at the age of 7-8 really stunts their development.


    #MPGA

  68. #68
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    How would one react to elder relatives who throws low-key shade at you now and then? They really cant do much beyond it so would you just let it pass? This is what I do atleast because its irrelevant and doesnt practically affect me...

    I dont think it as much and its not even back of my mind at times but just remembered reading this thread. It happens uncle of mine who sometimes take veiled jabs at me and then tries to compare me with his son. Not to be arrogant there really isn't any comparison whether its on a superficial level or academic or career achievements wise. And I also have a sharp tongue generally so normally I could just shut him up and make him regret it which is perhaps why I havent had bullies as such over the years.

    But in this case its family and because of parents you cant really do much due to whole 'respect your elders' mantra in our society.

    But how would other react in such a situation?


    #MPGA

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    Also boys who don't have their father around often grow up to be timid, due to only experiencing the loving nature of mom.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Musakhel View Post
    Also boys who don't have their father around often grow up to be timid, due to only experiencing the loving nature of mom.
    Not if your mother is the most aggressive person in your family.


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