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  1. #1
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    How the Coronavirus ruined my future plans!

    Had our wedding all booked and set for Mid April and a house going through around the same time...corona put a end to both things ..Venue closed down and mortgage probably withdrawn ( still praying on this one it goes through 50 50 as yet). Now fiances family being a hesitant to proceed with the wedding as they see this as some sort of divine sign , , wedding most likely off but hope they come around but not looking too good. Feeling quite depressed still live at parents Home thought my life was set and future was looking bright...Feeling down in the dumps. Love the girl too..Just needed to vent

  2. #2
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    Was this part of Allah swt plans for me? this freak incident had to occur now ..been divorced before and approaching mid thirties my life was set ...Back to square one meeting someone from scratch..Back to taking little comments from married siblings and family members...everything back to square 1. why corona why why Just feeling Lost. See no point in anything . I understand perspectives and being grateful which I am and thank The almighty for everything But cant see why I am being subjected to this. Really wanted an child by now..Back to the rat race.....

  3. #3
    Debut
    May 2015
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    The Capital Wasteland
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    Don’t worry about something that isn’t under your control. I don’t understand why your fiancťe family would think this is some divine sign though. That’s a big red flag


    Hard to get a handle on this double edged sword

  4. #4
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    Jun 2011
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    Delhi
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    Love or arrange marriage?

  5. #5
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    Jun 2009
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    Got emotionally manipulated in to a first marraige which caused an immense amount of stress and hard to divorce. girl is happy married now thankfully...Any single guys in thier mid thirties ? Hows life ......Acheieved everything I wanted to career wise ...excelled in 2 different vocations but see zero hapiness in financial gain..Just wanted to start a family and marry the girl I Love and be good and kind to her and be a nice father...Consumption of wild bats has ruined my plans and my future. Getting too old to meet someone now . God help me. Feeling on the brink. All i do is train and excersise which is getting old now . God help me please pray for me I'm feeling on the Brink

  6. #6
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    Feb 2015
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    Quote Originally Posted by Itachi View Post
    Love or arrange marriage?
    Seems weird and tough to figure out this one.

    Says he loves the girl which I donít know can be the case in an arranged marriage scenario esp before marriage. Like what is the love based on lol. But then again Iíve seen many arranged marriage couples go out of their way to profess love on social media. I guess itís cause they are feeling left out when compared to people who actually fell in love and married.

    But if it was an actual love marriage then surely the girl would fight her parents because the reasoning here is just ridiculous. I know a couple which just cancelled their grand wedding plan and did a small service of 10-15 people at their home due to this. And you can always postpone.

    Anyways. Corona has ruined many lives obviously but thereís really nothing we can do about that

  7. #7
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    Jun 2009
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    Not a very emotional just need to vent . Feel on the brink trying to keep it together during family iftars playing Big happy families but starting to hate putting a mask of happiness on. Really struggling to keep it together. Hope I see the light

  8. #8
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    Feb 2018
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    Honestly man sometimes we get dealt with a bad hand. We have everything planned and everything seems to be coming together but just when you thought it was all gonna be okay everything turns upside down. There is no point in stressing over situations we cant control. You will get through this and inshallah it will be okay. Times like this we just have to be grateful that we are alive and healthy.

  9. #9
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    Jun 2009
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    Thanks for the input. Just trying to keep it together . will soon propose an alternative wedding arrangement..Howwver can feel and sense fiance slipping away ...Allah give her all the happiness shes a really good person. Sometimes destinies are not intertwined. Not persuing her too much apart from the odd call .

    Love can develop through a strong bond in place of physical intimacy.

    Pray for me. Not seeing any enjoyment in any activity and cant fall asleep. Usually a a very easy going person and now snapping at family members. Anyway thanks for listening
    Last edited by big_pappa_cricket99; 23rd May 2020 at 10:34.

  10. #10
    Debut
    Oct 2004
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    May I suggest that you try and convince people that a Nikah with a few people be done and the couple be allowed to proceed with their lives? A party can always be held later.


    For the latest updates on Cricket, follow @PakPassion on Twitter

  11. #11
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    Jun 2009
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    Quote Originally Posted by MenInG View Post
    May I suggest that you try and convince people that a Nikah with a few people be done and the couple be allowed to proceed with their lives? A party can always be held later.
    I have ...currently in limbo whilst they "decide" which is a bad sign in itself. Curtains are closing unfortunately but Pray they come around . Currently in a predicament of praying then thinking I'm praying to God but God knew the corona was happening so why pray....The only joy I get is after a hours hard excersies then fall back in to dark cloud of despair. Hope I see the light and Gods plans for me. Maybe I'll look back this time next year and be glad it never happened..which has happened before...But all these are just coping mechanisms and when I think about
    our brains propensity to develop coping mechanisms it makes me even more depressed. Sometimes things really are better if they actually happened...Anyway I'm going of on a ramble . God help me Ameen
    Last edited by big_pappa_cricket99; 23rd May 2020 at 10:47.

  12. #12
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    Mar 2016
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    Quote Originally Posted by big_pappa_cricket99 View Post
    Had our wedding all booked and set for Mid April and a house going through around the same time...corona put a end to both things ..Venue closed down and mortgage probably withdrawn ( still praying on this one it goes through 50 50 as yet). Now fiances family being a hesitant to proceed with the wedding as they see this as some sort of divine sign , , wedding most likely off but hope they come around but not looking too good. Feeling quite depressed still live at parents Home thought my life was set and future was looking bright...Feeling down in the dumps. Love the girl too..Just needed to vent
    You are not alone. Many have had to abandon so many plans. COVID-19 has also ruined many of my plans.

    Just try your best and hope for the best. Trust God.
    Last edited by sweep_shot; 23rd May 2020 at 10:54.


    Bangladeshi Fan

  13. #13
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    Jun 2009
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    Already feeling marginally better. Thanks for everyones input.

  14. #14
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    Jan 2020
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    You got this brotha 💪 stay strong

    People are not getting jobs either outta college

  15. #15
    Debut
    Oct 2004
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    Quote Originally Posted by big_pappa_cricket99 View Post
    I have ...currently in limbo whilst they "decide" which is a bad sign in itself. Curtains are closing unfortunately but Pray they come around . Currently in a predicament of praying then thinking I'm praying to God but God knew the corona was happening so why pray....The only joy I get is after a hours hard excersies then fall back in to dark cloud of despair. Hope I see the light and Gods plans for me. Maybe I'll look back this time next year and be glad it never happened..which has happened before...But all these are just coping mechanisms and when I think about
    our brains propensity to develop coping mechanisms it makes me even more depressed. Sometimes things really are better if they actually happened...Anyway I'm going of on a ramble . God help me Ameen
    We have a similar predicament in our family and all have agreed that life cannot be held hostage by events like Coronavirus so Nikah will be done regardless and the couple will live together, even if a very small gathering is needed for whatever celebrations one wants to do within the laws of the land.

    May ALLAH swt help you and family take the right decision in this situation.


    For the latest updates on Cricket, follow @PakPassion on Twitter

  16. #16
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    Jun 2009
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    Quote Originally Posted by MenInG View Post
    We have a similar predicament in our family and all have agreed that life cannot be held hostage by events like Coronavirus so Nikah will be done regardless and the couple will live together, even if a very small gathering is needed for whatever celebrations one wants to do within the laws of the land.

    May ALLAH swt help you and family take the right decision in this situation.
    Ameen. appreciate the input brother. Trying to keep it together and be positive.

  17. #17
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    Feb 2009
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slog View Post
    Says he loves the girl which I donít know can be the case in an arranged marriage scenario esp before marriage. Like what is the love based on lol.
    Same thing the love in a love marriage is based on: an illusion. Being in love is a state of mind which we superimpose on our idea of the person rather than the person. We donít need to know the person. In fact, itís easier when we donít. Come to think of it, there need not even be a person.

  18. #18
    Debut
    Feb 2016
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    28.6139į N, 77.2090į E
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    Man! I am in a similar situation.
    Left job to prepare for CAT (MBA entrance exam), gave interviews and got selected for a decent B-school.
    Now because of this coronavirus situation I am unsure of joining college this year. Economy is expected to enter recession and spending lakhs for a MBA this year seems to be a foolish decision to me. Finding a job in this situation is also very difficult.
    Don't know what to do. Corona has wasted atleast two years of my life.

  19. #19
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    Jun 2009
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaptan View Post
    Man! I am in a similar situation.
    Left job to prepare for CAT (MBA entrance exam), gave interviews and got selected for a decent B-school.
    Now because of this coronavirus situation I am unsure of joining college this year. Economy is expected to enter recession and spending lakhs for a MBA this year seems to be a foolish decision to me. Finding a job in this situation is also very difficult.
    Don't know what to do. Corona has wasted atleast two years of my life.
    Man that is tough...what can j say I would console you by reminding you of all the people who barely have anything to eat or a roof to sleep under...but I doubt that will work as we tend to only see things through own lense. Hope it works out for you.

  20. #20
    Debut
    May 2014
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    chennai
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaptan View Post
    Man! I am in a similar situation.
    Left job to prepare for CAT (MBA entrance exam), gave interviews and got selected for a decent B-school.
    Now because of this coronavirus situation I am unsure of joining college this year. Economy is expected to enter recession and spending lakhs for a MBA this year seems to be a foolish decision to me. Finding a job in this situation is also very difficult.
    Don't know what to do. Corona has wasted atleast two years of my life.
    ? If your college starts this year then by next year or after things would be better, considering if you might take a loan interests rate are good.

    Unless you are coming out of college this year , it should be ok..

  21. #21
    Debut
    Feb 2015
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    Karachi/NYC
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaptan View Post
    Man! I am in a similar situation.
    Left job to prepare for CAT (MBA entrance exam), gave interviews and got selected for a decent B-school.
    Now because of this coronavirus situation I am unsure of joining college this year. Economy is expected to enter recession and spending lakhs for a MBA this year seems to be a foolish decision to me. Finding a job in this situation is also very difficult.
    Don't know what to do. Corona has wasted atleast two years of my life.
    Obv everyone has different situation but if you need to get an MBA at some point for sure then, I would say pursue it at this point if youíre not breaking the bank for the degree. Delaying doesnít achieve much and no one cares when the MBA was conferred. If anything people maybe sympathetic to your year if graduation. Lot of people graduated in 2008 from top schools and times were very uncertain but theyíre all doing fine now.

    You May struggle for a summer internship but the economy for sure will have rebounded by your second year. If it hasnít rebounded we are all screwed for sure anyway so nothing to lose.

    Ideally the option would have been to defer for one year and Join next year (dunno if indian schools allow) but considering thats not
    Possible this is an option to think about


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