Pakistan to ship emergency effigy supplies to Australia...[TSN]

[MIG]

This just in ....

The Pakistani government will be shipping thousands of Ponting and Shaun Tait effigies to Australia to help meet the upsurge in demand, caused by recent loss of the Ashes. The specially designed effigies will come with detachable limbs and inbuilt explosives to add more spice to effigy burning rituals, soon to begin Sydney this evening.

This unprecedented humanitarian move comes hot on the heels of Australias loss and Ricky Ponting becoming the first captain to lose the Ashes to England in 19 years !

The Pakistani minister for sports, Zahoor Khan, said in a televised interview on SkySports that as a nation, Pakistanis were experts in "dealing" with captains who lose crunch series and they felt that it was their duty to help fellow Australian cricket lovers in their moment of anguish....

[OTW]

Meanwhile, Shahryar Khan has been quoted saying (off the cuff) that if Australia want, he will provide help with the correct procedures on sacking a coach after a series loss.

In response, there are unconfirmed reports that John Buchanan is getting in touch with Javed Miandad - either it's about providing balcony dancing lessons, or making Pepthi ads.

[Monsee]

Monsee Times:

In a related news, Pak Govt is offering some of the Top Pak Effigie burners to Austraila to train, oversee, and ensure the proper burning and explosions of those effigies

When Australian PM heard the news, he was overcome with feelings of 'Love and Effection' for the Pakistani govt and said in a private message to Musharaf "I love you man"

When Indian officials heard of the breaking development, they decided to lodge an official protest with ICC and to see if this offer by Pakistan can be termed "Null and Void"...and instead Indian World Record Holding Stadium Burners can be Outsourced to Aussies

Stay tuned for further on this issue

[karachiite]

Another piece from a rogue reporter:

Pakistani president has had urgent talks with the Australian PM following the loss of little urn. While the president said that little urn's passing would be of great loss he said that it could be a turning point in the history of australian cricket. He said that for years politicians and bureaucrats have not been able to show their love for the game by having hard talks with players and management. Little urn's passing will now allow the australian cricketing setup to match that of the world leaders such as Sri Lanka and Pakistan.

Our sauces also report the president suggesting to the Aussie premier that the loss of little urn should be a matter of nationwide debate. The australians should take a leaf out of the pakistanis book and politicians who dont know their bouncer from their yorker should be given the task to sort out the mess. This would ensure that the process would be impartial as the politicians would have no personal agenda apart from self promotion.

With this the rogue reporter signs off

[Faisal Akhtar]

Originally Posted by MenInGreen This just in .... The Pakistani government will be shipping thousands of Ponting and Shaun Tait effigies to Australia to help meet the upsurge in demand, caused by recent loss of the Ashes. The specially designed effigies will come with detachable limbs and inbuilt explosives to add more spice to effigy burning rituals, soon to begin Sydney this evening. This unprecedented humanitarian move comes hot on the heels of Australias loss and Ricky Ponting becoming the first captain to lose the Ashes to England in 19 years ! The Pakistani minister for sports, Zahoor Khan, said in a televised interview on SkySports that as a nation, Pakistanis were experts in "dealing" with captains who lose crunch series and they felt that it was their duty to help fellow Australian cricket lovers in their moment of anguish....

[MIG]

And another update from Karachi....

Pakistani supporters burn Ponting effigies....one such person, Rahimu baba, claimed that since his Australian counterparts had no courage, Pakistanis would show them how its done....He then, promptly, lovingly set alight an effigy in the general shape of a well formed blob ( which he claimed was Inzi ). Some supporters also joined in saying that they needed practice ahead of Englands tour of Pakistan - incase the unthinkable happened...

[mulan]

Miggy! You want to have me committed or sumpin???? My colleagues are looking at me funny like....

[MIG]

Thats the general idea Mulan!

[Saj]

haha some funny stuff in this thread guys.

[OTW]

Bad mulan! No reading PP from work!